Deep Day September 8, 2008

This morning at church a teacher was talking about false summits and how we fill our lives with false summits b/c we are looking for the ultimate summit ( a relationship with our heavenly Father) but get distracted by what we believe might be fulfilling.  It made me think about what I am actively pursuing.  Am I actively pursuing the goals I say are in my life.  I say I want to go to Europe, am I actively pursuing that?  I say I want to live my life for Jesus, am I always actively pursuing a relationship with him?  I say I want to graduate, am I actively working on my Thesis so that I can?  Tough questions, even tougher to answer when I know the answer isn’t what I wish it would be.

Tonight, I was watching a video w/ some people and the man (forgot his name) asked this question, “Do you truly believe that what you believe is really real?”  It made me think about this morning and my thoughts on my pursuits.  If I truly believe in something then my pursuits will be a testimony of that.  My thoughts what I fill each day with will prove that I do in fact believe that it is real.  So, in restrospect, has what I have been filling my days with been acting as a testimony to what I say I believe?  Words are so easy to spew but when we look at our actions and what we do with each day………well, it’s humbling.

Living out what I say can really be a struggle for me.  I am an idealist – truly, that’s what the personality tests tell me.   An idealist is good at coming up with ideas, saying what needs to be said, offering suggestions but does not always follow through.  An idealist is creative but does not always act on those creative musings or inspirations.  I’m not always an initiator.  That’s something I have to consciously work on…….